Dungeon Crawl Classics RPG - Minneapolis

The Sea Queen Escapes, Part 2

Attending for today:

(For round 2 and 3)

Trevor – Memnoch the Triboleth
Jon – Knut the Warrior Beekeeper and Noj the thief (level 1)
Tim – DJ Hammerthrax the Dwarf, Krups the Dwarf (level 2)
Gary- Mosley, Cleric of Cthulhu – Zeddekar, Cleric of Molotoch (both level 1)
Ian – Wax the Wizard, Stoj the Halfling (lvl 2)

(Only for Round 3)
Clint – Zobol the Halfling and Beezo the Yeti Warrior

We resumed after a 2 day game-time break for the characters to rest and recover. The party was also joined by Wax, who had found the note Memnoch left him at the Three Lions and sailed down the river to meet them in Majestic, following a trail of carnage and angry visitors no doubt.

Having gained the Horn of the Tundines, they made their way out to open water in Lake Majestic and Memnoch blew the horn, summoning the giant sea (swamp) turtle. Since the party seemed a little undersized without Zobol and Bizo, I allowed them to bring another dwarf and halfling. The party explored the turtle hideout and made fairly quick work of the sea anemone monster, the three cursed thief guards, and then rather rashly knocked open the door to the treasure room, triggering the body switching curse, hilarity ensued and there was much cursing of Michael Curtis.

Then joined by Zobol and Bizo, the party made their way to the island prison of the Sea Queen, where they entered, found her magical name (but failed to connect the dots and use it.) They made their way through the living tar golem room, destroyed him, and finally freed the Sea Queen, who fled the prison with them. (Although Memnoch, via his prison-body of Mosley, cast Detect Evil on the Sea Queen and her Handmaidens, each one made her Will save and the party was fooled enough to let them get close up… and attack!)

The ensuing combat was quite dangerous and Team Sea Queen nearly dropped Bizo in the first round— then did succeed in dropping Memnoch & Mosley, but the party was able to quickly heal them with some timely magic item use and clutch Laying on of Hands. Spell checks were made pretty effectively and Rope Use and Sleep actually combined to subdue the Sea Queen, after which the party decided to put her back in her prison, securing it carefully with the key and take the key. (Zobol has the key).

In the aftermath, Boorqual the Sea King met them in Majestic to give them the following boons for the destruction (!) of the Sea Queen. (Interestingly, no one corrected him about the destruction of the Sea Queen)

1. A little red/black sponge that allows them to breathe and function under water for 48 hours (one each)
2 A black pearl (Memnoch grabbed it)
3. A vial of pure magical lake water that removed the curse from their bodies once they were bathed together in it.

(rounds 1 and 3)
Zobol & Bizo:

Wax, Stoj and Krups (Rounds 2 and 3)

Everyone else – all 3 rounds
Total: 25xp

The Sea Queen Escapes, Part 1

Roll Call:

Trevor – Memnoch the Triboleth
Jon – Knut the Warrior Beekeeper and Noj the thief
Clint – Zobol the Halfling and Beezo the Yeti Warrior
Tim – DJ Hammerthrax the Dwarf
Gary- Mosley, Cleric of Cthulhu – Neddekar, Cleric of Molotoch- Argus, Cleric of Justicar (Deceased)

The story opened with Memnoch waking to a chanced world (changes due to the events in “Wayfarer of the Winter Calendar” playtest, Oct. 2015.
LochNwar is now under the rule of Tyrson, a half-titan godling jealously guarding his city vs. the schemes of others like him.
The Dwarves Guild has been reinstated.
Szymandia is betrothed to Tyrson in his effort to forge an alliance with Dothde (The Dark Elves)
Memnoch’s majordomo Grex, is an official overseeing the Primary Chamber- dictating the painful, paralyzing customs and bureaucracy that frustrate the whole city.
Memnoch’s new steward Chester seems kind of.. different.
Nara, the girl who came from Shlum, and has been working in the Three Lions, is pregnant.
Wax the Elf was unavailable as he had removed himself to a “Chaos Yoga” retreat.
Loch Nwar, like most of the other major cities of the Right Hand world, were in a constant state of war and covert intrigue with each other, somewhat spurred by the domination of them by the rival godlings that stride the earth like a plague.

Despite a vivid dream and remembrance of how things had been, the dreams began to recede and after a while Memnoch accepted this as the way it was. His associates too were haunted by the same thoughts, but slowly accustomed themselves to thinking differently.

On top of this strangeness, Memnoch was haunted by strange dreams of a Sea Queen who begged him to rescue her from the island of Ait, where she had been imprisoned by the evil wizard Shadinkind. He was surprised to find that her likeness was already in a painting he had never seen before in a remote corridor of the Zymetris mansion. When he gathered Knut, DJ and Zobol (and Beezo) to float the idea of rescuing the Sea Queen, they all revealed that they had encountered similar dreams. The group resolved to seek her out and rescue her, and to be rewarded by the bounty of gold and pearls that her father the Sea King would provide.

As they discuss their plans, they were interrupted by the arrival of three brothers (?)— clerics of Law, Chaos and Neutral, sent by their masters on a competition to see who would survive and rise in the ranks. Also amongst their number was Noj the thief, who accompanied them for more mundane matters. Memnoch was impressed with their spirit of adventure and he instantly decided to befriend (USE THEM) the clerics and bring them along to rescue the Sea Queen.

After voluminous, pain-staking customs and gifts to the customs and gate officials, the party set off for Lake Majestic, where the Island of Ait was said to be. Sailing downriver on a river barge known as the Gleaming Metropolis, they arrived at the town of Thulud, They entered the tavern known as the Crooked Oar, bought a round and started to inquire with the locals. To their horror, the bartender started to itch badly, then peeled off his skin, transforming into a silver skeletal demon attacking them. Combat ensued and Memnoch zoned the Demon with a sleep spell, then prepared to burn him in the street. The terrified locals gathered and started to mob the party, but a deft charm against “Zoltan the Lake Ranger” helped to calm the locals, although they were again even more terrified when the Skeleton demon floated away screaming and afire.

The party decided it was best to seek the wizard immediately and leave Thulud, striking out in Zoltan’s boat Bessie— Shadinkind’s supposed hideout was well known, though the wizard was more of a legend than a well known wizard. Entering his home carefully, the party found a vast cavern filled with floating turtle-shells and navigated it mostly with the help of RopeWork spell cast by Memnoch, though Argus the Cleric died in the process. They were also ambushed by some lamprey-men who threw harpoons at them, but were vanquished in subsequent rooms. From there, they made their way to a pool containing a giant clam, which various hints through out the building seemed to imply had a magic shell-horn. The lagoon in which this clam was visible also had a shark guarding it, but the adventurers were clever (Zobol’s idea!) and used some of the fish of the lamprey men to decoy the shark and get it close enough for Memnoch to neutralize it with a sleep spell.*

With the shark neturalized, and the aid of underwater jelly-fish suits discovered earlier, Beezo, DJ, Knut were able to wrench open the clam jaws and take the shell-horn, and then, after another lamprey-men battle, they stole some eggs and are left the wizard’s hideout. Their intention is to decipher the script on the horn and then proceed to the next stage of using it to rescue the Sea Queen!

CrawlJammer 2: The Acid Island of the Forbidden Dreamer

Roll call:

Ian – Falina the Cat Person
Gary – Blue Debbie the Psychic Knight (Deceased) / Clubber Lang the Gunner
Mark – Dr. Arthur Nebulon the Technomancer (Deceased) / Warrior
Jon – Senrac the Mutant plant (deceased) / Mynoc the thief
Tim – Kotha the thief (deceased) / Nibbitz the Riftrunner

The adventure started with the crew of the Calico having returned to Chartless, the smugglers’ haven hidden in a moon, built upon the scales of a giant sleeping dragon. The new captain of the Calico, Kotha the Thief, being Lawful, decided to inquire with Keenan Jithers, representative of the Avalon Empire to see if they might continue in the service of privateering for the rebel Empress Margayne.

Jithers has a mission for them— disrupt the schemes of the False Emperor Artur, who has summoned a demon ship from Hellspace; this ship runs on the dreams of the innocent, and coupled with the dreams of a mystic prodigy known as the Forbidden Dreamer, the ship will be the most powerful vessel in the Empire of Avalon. The mission is to get the Dreamer and return him to Jithers, disable this vessel, the Infernal Prize, or otherwise prevent the crew of the Prize from acquiring the Forbidden Dreamer.

The journey is undertaken; as they approach the moon of Morpheus, they see an exotic ship following them, and then hovering in orbit, apparently waiting for Kotha’s crew to the dirty work so they can attack them with the prize on the way out.

The Calico lands, seeing four plinths on an otherwise featurless rocky atoll in an ocean of acid. The plinths are investigated, first revealing an illusionary staircase, then triggering an onslight of crystal robots. The robots put up a good fight, enough trouble that at one point Kotha actually retracts the landing gear from the Calico to tip the ship over on it (destroying it utterly— boss move of the game!)

After the ship was repaired, they descended to the next level, where they found the Forbidden Dreamer, guarded by four red-clad Kung Fu movie style monks, with a serpent curled around the altar on which a young boy lay sleeping. Although Dr. Nebulon charmed two of the monks, the rest slew Kotha and held off the party long enough for the serpent to wake (4 rounds) and then the serpent breathed its electrical dragon breath upon the party, slaying Senrac, Dr. Nebulon and Blue Debbie. Nebbitz ( the Riftrunner who had joined when Kotha fell) barely avoided the breath weapon with his Rift porting powers.

Falina, who had already run away, survived and the acid poured in to the island complex, destroying the Dreamer, and presumably the Dragon (and whatever treasure may have been there, including the open-eye blinking amulets the monk had worn). Falina escapes on the ship but of course the waiting ship finds them and after a brief battle of maneuvers and attempted boarding, the crew of the Infernal Prize (Captain Church, Mr Sprock, Bones Lucroy and two red-shirted guards) boards the Calico. There is a standoff, in which Captain Church orders Mr Sprock to do a “Demonic Mind Melt” with Nebbitz in order to ascertain that the Dreamer is indeed destroyed- dashing their hopes to have the ultimate dream-fuel power source for the Infernal Prize. Demanding a tribute to let the ship pass (perhaps unwilling to risk more with the battle-weary crew of the Calico), Captain Church took his gold and retired to the Infernal Prize, letting the Calico limp back to Chartless.

(Playtest): Feast of the Preserver

Roll call:

Brandon- Ark the Elf
Tim – Kronkite the Wizard
Jon – Nara the Cleric of Trigestus
Trevor – Rumpus the Halfling & Herod Ironbreaker the Dwarf

The story opens with the party finding a dead body on a secluded road. They party has been hired to find the raider Jarrod Moguard and bring him in dead or alive. The dead body, showing signs of violence, has a paper inviting people to the Feast of the Preserver in the town of Barrowton, with a little map showing how to arrive there. (The first in character thing in the whole adventure is Ark the Pricker, disturbing Elf, seeing the body and saying “Let’s eat him”).

The party finds the town of Barrowton and find a dusty town full of emaciated people. They are greeted by the town Elder, Lucian who asks them to recover their EndFast Feast, which has been stolen by Jarrod Mogard and his band of cut-throats. They are known to be hiding in a silver mine close by. The party members agree to take up the quest for the promise of a family magic item heirloom (Knowing there is little money to be had here in this town).

On the way to the silver mine, they encounter a madman who keeps saying that “They won’t eat me!” and who pees on the leg of Nara the Cleric. They leave him to his insane devices and venture on.

Finding the silver mine, they investigate the cave of the giant who lives above the mine-entrance, but see no point in combat with him, so they leave him alone and press forward into the mine.

Following outcomes of mine exploration:

  • Party quickly finds a band of ghouls that are trying to get into a barred door. They destroy the ghouls and leave the door (!) to explore some of the rest of the silver mine, find a nearby chasm, a lift to lower levels, etc.
  • They return to the door, break it open and find Felicia the Elf (note, I avoided the name Alexis, for no good reason) surrounded by corpses, both ghoul and non-ghoul, as well as the crates containing the Endfast feast. The Cleric uses his healing power to restore Felicia’s mind and she tells them what has happened in the mine (Jarrod turned ghoul and slew his band before she cut him down).
  • They party looks in the crates and after some investigation, realizes that the Endfast Feast is decayed human meat (!!!) They decide not to return such a disgusting feast to the village, pitching it into the chasm and sacrificing its 100 gp value to Trigestus in order to remove some disapproval.
  • Journeying lower, they eventually kill some more ghouls and find spider-eggs of the Arachnaefiend, the tampering of which summons this dread demon. After a pitched battle with this fiend, which drops three of the party, the Arachnaefiend is Banished back to Hell by Nara, who manages to barely save the party members via magical healing.
  • Finally, they finish off the rest of the ghouls, barely survive a fall from the lift (OUCH!) and decide to return to the village to see what Lucian and the villagers do when presented with crates full of ghoul-parts instead of living human parts.

On the way back to the village, they get lost and find themselves standing in the churchyard outside town. They enter the church where the ghost of Zechariah the Judge, tries to possess Nara, to no avail. Sensing what is happening, the Dwarf Herod throws his soul open and allows himself to be possessed, learning that Lucian is very bad and he slew Zechariah, etc.

Shortly thereafter, they return to the village and when they return with the crates, the villagers appear to get their food. Lucian throws open the crates and finds the ghoul-meat— enraged, he attacks the adventurers and the villagers do likewise. Kronkite is incinerated with a Scorching Ray but the rest of the party is saved when Ark the Pricker invokes the aid of Sezrekan, his patron, and via Spellburn and halfling luck, they party is teleported to a safe place many hundreds of miles away. The evil of the Preserver lives on… at least for now…!

There shall come... a CRAWLJAMMER

Roll call:

Phil – Tarn the Technomancer
Jon – Senrac the Mutant
Ian – Felina the Cat Person
TIm – Kotha the Thief
Trevor – Magnus the Cleric of Margayne

The adventure begins with Kotha, who has requested a ‘fabulous night ship’ from Sakanta as part of his boon for rescuing the Sun (see: Trials of the Toymakers), confronting an actual floating longship hovering above her in the night sky above Loch Nwar.

The longship Calico has been summoned to the Right Hand World by the bond it shares with the blade Whisker, long in the possession of Kotha the Thief (See : Tower of the Black Pearl). Lowering a rope ladder, the crew invites Kotha to join them where she is welcomed by her new crew: First Mate Falina, the gunner Senrac, the engineer Tarn and Cleric of Margayne, the deposed demigoddess and Queen Imperial of a Thousand Systems. It appears that the Calico is bonded to the rapier and Kotha by right of possessing Whisker, is destined to be the Captain of this ship.

The crew whisks Kotha away (With nary a word of explanation to DJ, Memnoch, et al) to the strange city of Chartless, hidden inside a faraway planet’s moon, nestled in the scales of a gigantic dragon. Here, the crew shows her around Chartless and helps her buy some new weaponry, including a deadly “Hand Cannon”. Shortly thereafter, they speak with Keenan Jithers, a former mercenary company agent (Ugle & Kalute), now working for the rebel faction supporting Margayne. Jithers hires them to explore the newly arrived “Skull Ship” in this sector of space.

Off they go into the furthest reaches of space to find this skullship. Entering this deathtrap, they find it rife with evil creatures and Magnus starts by banishing the elemental Lava Knight laying in wait for them inside the statuary. Then they go into the subsequent rooms and Magnus is trapped by Kadlach, Archon of the Entertainment center, nephew of Ystrick the Bold. It turns out that this strange place is in fact a dungeon that is also a reality show— a contest broadcast to a live audience in the Abyss, howling for blood. Remarkably, Magnus’s lizard-dog Sker actually manages to herd the grenadelings off to the side long enough to not get destroyed.

Magnus barely defeats Kadlach and his Unseen Savants as well as his “Intestinal grenadiers”, while the rest of the party fends off an undead Roper and two Skeletal Giant Kings, but not before Tarn is irrecoverably slain. Senrac the plant mutant then takes the helm of the Skull Ship and shut down the skull-ship’s eyeball attackships and vamplings, making good their escape but not before nabbing 130 gp in gems and the barely touchable Chaos Crown worn by one of the Skeletal Giants. Most notably, they put the ship on a direct course for the sun and make haste away from it.

What’s next for the crew of the Calico? How will they replace their (we assume) beloved engineer? Who will Sker the dog herd next? Will Senrac manage to stay awake in darkness? Tune in next session for more Crawljamming Chaos-Conquering Concepts!!

Magnus- 15
Rest- 10


Intrigue By the Black Lake

Roll call:

Clint – Zobol the halfling and Bizo the Yeti
Ian – Wax the Elf
Memnoch – Trevor the Actor

Session opened with the resolution of Sakanta’s boon for BIzo and Zobol. Zobol asked for Bizo to be smarter + be able to speak; Bizo asked for a bad ass axe like the legendary Frostensnoot. Both wishes were granted! Clint re-rolled Bizo’s intelligence (13!) and Bizo shortly thereafter discovered the legendary Frostensnoot, lodged in a tree-trunk. Seizing the axe, Bizo turned to his companion and said his first word: “TO” or later, what was understood to mean “TWO”— as in the double blade of the axe.

Returning to Loch Nwar, the Hyperbaron was petitioned by the nobleman Everett Salas to vote his seat in the Primary Chamber, particularly on the issue of increasing trade “with the key city of Hoz to the West,” in order to get more gunpowder for the new-fangled powder weapons in Loch Nwar. Memnoch did as requested, after talking to lady Szymandia, who also urged him to do the same, but only after realizing in discussion with Wax and Zobol that Hoz was the tiny town at the base of the mountain to which the golden chain of the heavens was attached— hardly a teeming metropolis, or even a likely place to contain gunpowder (Not to mention that the adventurers saw it mostly depopulated by mad alchemists only a few months back…)

Following Sezrekan’s direction to rid Loch Nwar of other patron worshippers, they hatched a plan to locate and send them to their deaths. Zobol went to a seedy bar on the Eastern outskirts of the right bank and met some pilgrims who had been commanded in dreams to go to the Croaking Fane and join the tadpole transformation of their kind (but they were late).

Meanwhile, Wax met four juvenile ne’er do wells who were apparently occult dilettantes interested in acquiring BIzo for use in ritual slaughter (as well as, perhaps, organ harvesting). Wax declined this offer, but did agree to trade some drugs with them and later visited the island of their patsy, Ykorl, the seventh Ultra-Marquis of Kenderton,

Meanwhile, Bennigan Perkins the halfling arrived and quickly revealed via charm that he was a helpless thrall of a strange hybrid of the Savage Hounds black goo and the Well of the Worm creature… the thing that had been stewing in Zobol’s underground hobbit-hole, hundreds of miles distant. It wanted nothing more than to destroy Zobol apparently.

The heroes sent their charmed myrmidopplegangers out to try to locate the temple of the rival toad faction—those that worshipped the yellow toad Bogbulbiz. This intrigue was successful and shortly thereafter, the three puppetmasters sent the pilgrims and Slurpo to the distant temple to annihilate the cultists and hopefully each other there. Following a few days behind (and fending off an attack by the strange orange-skinned worm-riders known as the Tromii), the party finally arrived to find that the pilgrims and cultists had apparently killed each other off to a man, but only after one party or the other had destroyed Slurpo and Bennigan.

Zobol did find a magical spear, the butt of which carries a toad’s head— it was lodged in the belly of the strange Were-toad that had led the pilgrims.

Meanwhile in Loch Nwar, the myrmidoppelgangers, due to expire from their charm before the heroes returned to the city, had been ordered to spy out the locations of the Arakne and then march into the Croaking Fane, where Memnoch believes that the idol still waits to destroy all those who would enter. The spies this time failed in their intrigue, and apparently followed their orders as they have disappeared entirely by the time the heroes return to Loch Nwar.

Also, Narva the maiden from Schlum, had found a strange coded document in the wall of the Three Lions (inn owned by Memnoch & Publio)— had not been de-coded yet at session’s end.

Also the various mithril plaques from the Toymakers and the platinum plates from Croaking Fane have yet to be converted to currency of any kind— thus the debts on the Hyperbaron’s property are still outstanding.

Funniest moment: Either Zobol the Halfling browebeaten into drinking rubbing alochol cocktails with live tadpoles or the epic “roommate fight” Memnoch and Wax had about why Wax had not enticed the strange dilettantes to die with the cultist cage match.

Awarding only 3 xp for the various encounters (which were easy) but I will award Luck (Destiny) and XP (Cohesion) to the newly formed secret society of the Three Lions which has now joined in the intrigues within Loch Nwar…

The Croaking Fane

Roll call:

Jon – Knut the Beekeeper Badass, Riley the Halfling
Tim – DJ the Dwarf & Kotha the Thief
Ian – Wax the Sunless
Brett – Pembroke the Cleric, Sushgali the Warrior
Trevor – Hyperbaron Memnoch Zemetris the Shibboleth

The adventure started with the adventurers returning from the village of Zemetris where they had rescued the Sun and given their boon requests to the god Sakanta. Along the way back to Loch Nwar, they encountered the strange cleric Pembroke, servant of the mysterious Amun Tur and his henchman Sushgali. Returning to the Hyperbaron’s estate, they found some strange minstrel performers waiting for them, camped outside the estate. When Wax cast sleep on them, they reverted to their true form— the legendary and dreaded MYRMIDOPPLEGANGERS, ant-headed facelesss creatures. WIth the aid of multiple charm spells and the Hyperbaron’s dungeon, they have converted the Myrmd’s to their cause and plan to use them to infiltrate the other patron-cults in Loch Nwar.

Shortly thereafter, they were visited by two strange squatly built, sweaty representatives of the Salientian Knot, who started to offer Memnoch & co. a deal to find the Croaking Fane and put down their toadlike rivals. Before they could even discuss negotiations, a giant foot tore through Memnoch’s estate and crushed them into pulp— this auspicious entrance heralding the appearance of Sezrekan who ordered Memnoch to find the Croaking Fane and destroy the cultists therein in order to promote his patronage in Loch Nwar. Memnoch took up the challenge and was promised a long-desired bonus spell if he fulfilled his mission.

They journeyed to the Croaking Fane and entered the strangely quiet temple. Investigating the first level carefully, they avoided most of the pitfalls that amateurish adventurers would fall prey to (good job guys!)

Notable kudos:

  • Brent for guessing the name of the “Toad-goyles” before they even
  • DJ for putting his pole in the fountain
  • Memnoch for using knock to disable the toad alms statue.
    Ian for avoiding the slime monster in one of the transepts altogether.
    Memnoch cast Rope Mastery yet again, destroying untold thousands with the Spell Killer result and also the Dimensional Schism, Summoning extra-dimensional versions of himself as mirror images, including Mech-Shibboleth, Female Memnoch (servant of Sezrekanna), Blaxploitation Memnoch, Vulcan Memnoch, Drow Memnoch and Memnoch, servant of patron Wax.

They went to the lower levels, where they encountered some strange incense, a toad-cult hashpipe and Riley barely survived a fiery fey rune. They wisely avoided a room full of evil toad-mummies, but Wax did get dinged up by a spear-trap and then grabbed the Silver tablet of the cult. They recoiled in revulsion at the odd and unnatural frescoed couplings of the Toad Orgy room…

Advancing to the toad pools, they were saved by an outrageously successful sleep spell cast by Memnoch, which zapped most of the toads to sleep. The PCs courageously slaughtered the sleeping toads, waking up a few accidentally but dispatching them easily. They rescued the strange and annoying Llulch and proceeded to the Lair of the Toad Thing.

Amazingly, Wax, using the froghemoth controller-bone from the Hunting Lodge of the Arakne, was able to charm the Toad Thing. They proceeded to the cult transmutation pool and had a battle royal with the cultists. Again, Amazingly, when Wax directed he charmed Toad Thing to destroy the cultists, he fumbled the Pers check (TWICE IN A ROW) and the toad thing turned on the party, finally swallowing Knut whole (!) Thanks to kickass DJ, among others, they Toad-thing was defeated and the cultists were slain, but not before Memnoch misfired his Charm and fell madly in love with the Toad-Thing (!! WHICH HAS HAPPENED BEFORE, HE HAS A THING FOR FISH/REPTILES/AMPHIBIANS !!).

Pembroke was able to heal Knut just before he would have been lost forever and then to Neutralize the Disease that Wax had acquired from the tablet— finally, they were able to avoid the idol by fleeing desperately and using Memnoch’s Knock to overcome the Ward Portal.


Sezrekan has named his goal to be first patron amongst Loch Nwar.
The party found lots of loot in the Croaking Fane— but how will they spend it??
Kotha has yet to collect her boon, which she will in the next adventure.. a bona fide space ship (CRAWLJAMMER??)
Wax has a small contingent of Myrmidoppleganger spies!!


Trials of the Toymakers

Roll call:

Trevor – Memnoch the Triboleth
Jon – Knut the Beekeepin’ Badass
Clint – Zobol the Slug-tamer, Bizo the Yeti
Ian – Wax the mage and Absalom the NIghtmare priest (Deceased)
Tim – DJ the Dwarf and Captain Kotha

The adventure starts in the village of Zymetris, where the adventurers have been summoned to examine the poor production of lumber, pelts and wild-rice coming out of this obscure Northern province. (The new Hyperbaron, Memnoch, is hereditary lord of this obscure community - as of last adventure- and needs income to dig out of the 2000 gp debt he also inherited).

While visiting the village, the adventurers hear that the eternal solstice ritual of gifts being delivered to the village children has been disrupted, a scary portent of disorder. Worse yet, three village children are missing, having struck off into the Taboo Lands to seek out the source of the solstice issues. After the gift of the sacred OONTHALO ( a hat made from a stuffed muskrat) to Wax, the adventurers decide to go the Taboo Lands and investigate matters for themselves.

In the lake country, they find a mysterious island and are ambushed by six shrubberies, wisely deciding to canoe the rest of the way to the island. In the island, they quickly discover a lair of dead toy-making gnomes, fighting wooden arachnid-constructs, before finding the missing children and starting to slowly piece together the mystery of what happened to the gnomes.

In short order:
1) They slay a stuffed bear that attacks them.
2) Wax and DJ fall down an elevator shaft, both breaking their right legs...(actually, they died, but their bodies were rolled over and both were found miraculously alive by the virtue of Luck rolls! Between that and the broken limbs, their stats may never be the same…)
3) They journey back down to the lowest level and find a cage full of large moles, trying the exotic delicacy of MOLE MILK for the first time.
4) They go down to the quarry where they encounter a giant slug, which Zobol the animal trainer tames with a nat 20 on the dice…!
5) They explore the fourth level, finding all manner of dead gnomes and various planet-ariums, schematics and other things. Captain Kotha with her maritime skills is able to read the star charts (as well as making a crit (nat20!) on Reading the Gnome language…!

Finally, after an encounter with some gnome ghosts, they ascend to the sacred treasure room and find the golden mill, which must be used to prepare the components of the artifacts to complete the ritual of rescuing the Sun. Now Ydreksas the demon appears to use his envy magic on them! A spell duel ensues, in which Memnoch, Wax and Absalom try to fend him off while Kotha and Knut use the mill.

Memnoch is defeated first, driven into a rage of envy for Zobol’s magical Horn, looking for the hidden halfling. Wax misfires her Invoke Patron just as she is hit by the Envy, both driving her mad with envy of religious types, forcing her to slay the strange but quite useful priest Absalom the cleric. (“Thanks for all the healing.. NoW DIE!!”) Knut subdued DJ the Dwarf, struck with envy of Knut’s superior stamina. By the time all this mayhem had occurred, Kotha had managed to burn through many luck points (also with Zobol’s help) and finally activated the artifact, rescuing the Sun!

The village is saved, and the villagers reluctantly agree to work harder for the glory of Hyperbaron Zemetris. That night in their dreams, in the hut of the village shaman, a vision of SAKANTA, the bear-god comes to them, offering them a great boon for their service in rescuing the Sun… for what will they ask…???

XP: 19
Luck: 1 point of Luck for the Lawful characters.

Garden of Dread

Roll call:

Tim – Kotha the Thief, DJ the Dwarf
Ian – Wax the Sunless
Jon – Knut the Warrior (& Beekeeper)
Charlie – Publio the Thief
Josh – Dranor the Cleric (servant of Amun Tor)
Trevor – Memnoch the Triboleth
Clint – Zobol the Halfling, Bizo the Yeti Warrior

The adventure opened with a band of musicians and heralds making their way to the Three Lions where they delivered a message to Memnoch declaring him to be the only known heir of Hyper Baron Glotalis Zemetris (!) The Hyperbaron lives on the Second Central Island in Loch Nwar and summoned Memnoch to attend him.

Note: Wax tried to get the Chain of Heaven shavings re-forged into a mask, but couldn’t come up with the 100gp to re-forge it… (more to come…?)

Memnoch sought to charm Grex the Herald (Majordomo, Poobah, Grand Notary, et al) and succeeded in causing 4 passersby to fall in love with each other.

Kotha investigated the Island and the Hyperbaron and could find no link to the Arakne, but she did find that some thieves had gone to case the island recently and hadn’t returned.

Memnoch journeyed to the temple of Amun Tor, where he met Dranor, keeper of secrets. He retained the services of Dranor as those priests are important in arguing the finer points of genealogy. Shortly thereafter, Memnoch and co., including Dranor, ventured to the island to meet the Hyperbaron.

Turns out the Hyperbaron is a wizened old man in a small wooden throne. Pontifus Grimready, High Logician of the Fourth Development, spoke for him and bade Memnoch and friends to look into the goings-on there. After a short negotiation that turned sour, Pontifus, being Lawful-aligned to the point of fantacism, summoned the ARCHONS OF LAW- 6 law atuomatons, a unicorn and a Radiant Archon – to do battle on his behalf.

A long battle ensued in which:

1) Dranor cut off and acquired the unicorn horn.
2) Pontifus was felled and Bizo threw Zobol at the Logician; shortly thereafter Zobol fed him the black Chaos-goo he had harvested from the Shadow-hound pool in Doom of the Savage Kings.
3) Memnoch charmed three automatons.
4) Knut, DJ and Wax combined to destroy the angel and in so doing, DJ acquired her war-mace, Thundercross. It’s quite intelligent, has a terrible disarming thunder power and speaks, informing DJ that it wishes nothing more than to destroy Ystrick, Arch-Demon of the 14th Hell.

Although they bested the forces of Law, the adventurers decided to scout the garden in order to clear out the bad stuff or at least figure out what’s going on in there! After destroying the undead-mutated Hans the Gardener, they met a Chaos fey gnome who informed them that Hyperbaron Zemetris had betrayed the generations-long pact to put out a bowl of cream each morning for the garden gnomes and other denizens of the Summer Kingdom, who were linked to the estate via the blue stone set into the Hyperbaron’s chandelier. Hyperbaron Memnoch Zemetris decreed that cream will now again be set out, and has every reason to expect that the garden will return to normal, making him a normal and successful denizen of Loch Nwar’s nobility (!)


Thundercross the Mace (see notes)
Rings of Pontifus – one is a token of Law (cross), the other is a class ring from Loch Nwar prepatory, class of 3587 – each worth 100gp


Luck: 1 for all Chaotic characters

Chain of Fools


Aaron – Tursik the Neutral + Hunter the 0 level
Patrick – Nom the Neutral, servant of Ilvedere + “Little Nom”
Jon – Knut the Warrior + William the 0 level
GatorTodd – Dosh the Dwarf, missionary of Rainbow + Yellow the Silvered
Ian – Wax the Sunless + Ewe the slave (Deceased)
Rob – Roche the Master Thief + henchman
Tim – Kotha the Thief & DJ the Dwarf + henchman

The adventure begins with the ransacking of the convention of the Society of Circumspect Indifference, a secret organization dedicated to preserving the balance of Neutrality. Not only where members massacred, but an important map was stolen— the map that shows the way to Mount Desmos, where legend has it a chain actually hangs from the heavens, binding the Earth into place— the chain on which the Right Hand World literally depends! This theft was the design of the Academy of Dark Alchemy, whose chaotic members have long sought to find the chain and shave its metal in order to feed their Chaos magic.

By luck of the draw, fate or what-have-you, Tursik and Nom, two members of the Society stumble into the Three Lions, where Roche & Dosh have recently arrived on a world tour. Negotiations ensue and Roche, Dosh and the assembled members of the Sezrekan Gang all throw in to travel to Desmos as hirelings of Tursik & Nom.

Travel is tedious across the plains, only broken up by hiring some henchmen in the town of BOOGL. (This town is so remote that the zero-level characters are stone-age pregens.)

The city of Dothde, the Dark Elves, was seen at a remove but when it could not be approached by the contingent to seek it out, the party abandoned that hope.

Finally, they came to the village of Hoz at the foot of Mt Desmos. Unbeknownst to the party, the Alchemists had already raided Hoz and killed the villagers before establishing a base here. After they poisoned the party and tried to burn them alive in the only inn building in Hoz, the adventurers fought their way out and defeated the guardsmen. One, negotiating for his freedom, brought them to a girl who had been transmuted entirely into silver. Wax and Kotha both lost their henchmen to the guards here.

The party wasted no time getting up the mountain, triggering one trap that launched spears at them from non-Euclidean space and avoiding another trap by carefully opening sliding doors. They were ambushed by crossbowmen and a bloody battle ensued in which the weakened party barely bested the bowmen. Capturing more guards alive, they learned that the ceremony was going on even at that moment. They hurried to the stairs to attain the upper level and were attacked by a surviving, blinded giant that had been one of the monks at the monastery— only Nom was able to talk him into peaceful friendship.

On the next level, a party of guards and “Bronze Dogs” was encountered and defeated before they party made their way up to the top level, seeing the chain and Grandmaster Egus of the Academy and his golem-like “project”, the living creature of Silver known as “The Silver Saint”. Nom cast a darkness that the Dwarves were able to negotiate and the Saint suddenly went mad, his transformation goading him to destroy the chain, even as Egus tried to destroy the party.

A long combat ensued in which Yellow the Molotov-wielding henchmen was turned to silver, along with Knut’s shield; Wax was transformed via spell burn into a Chaos thief avatar to destroy the Saint; and Tursik finished off the Grandmaster by successfully lifting him off the ground via Ropework and dropping him to his death.

Notable items:

Egus’s spellbook
Ring of the Silver sheen – +1 AC (due to the metallic silver sheen the wearer’s skin gains)
2 high-explosive pellets
1 acid pellet

Total: 15 xp
Neutrals – 2 luck
Chaotics & Lawfuls – 1 luck


I'm sorry, but we no longer support this web browser. Please upgrade your browser or install Chrome or Firefox to enjoy the full functionality of this site.